Luke 15:1-10      What Do People Want?     March 28, 2010

     Several years back, Mel Gibson starred in a movie called “What Women Want.  Gibson was a ladies man for many years who suddenly found he had the power to read women’s minds.  He suddenly knew exactly when to give flowers, when to lean close, when to retreat, exactly what to say as he chased the ladies.  It seemed great.  But then as he really listened to what women wanted, he discovered that they thought he was a jerk.  Gibson slowly began to change.  And the more he listened, the more he changed into a man who really wanted to know what women wanted in life.

     Well, the church in some ways is like Mel Gibson in this movie.  We often wonder what it is that people want when they come to visit a church.  And we are afraid that if we are too pushy or preachy, they will think we are a bunch of jerks.  What we really need to do is listen.  Jesus tells the story of the shepherd seeking the lost sheep.  Well, that shepherd needs to listen.  Listen to the heartfelt cry of the lost sheep.  If we listen to what people say they want, then we can learn.  We are finishing today as series of messages on Evangelism.  We have been trying to discover how best to share the good news of God’s love which changes lives and transforms the world.  That is evangelism.  It is seeking and saving that which is lost.  And if we want to be any good at evangelism, we first learn to listen.  First and foremost, Evangelism is not about telling people what we think they need as it is listening to them about what they feel they are seeking in life.  So what is it that people want when they come to church?

     (Use screen)  Well, first, we should ask what people want in order to first visit a church.  Well, like Mel Gibson, let’s listen to some people who were surveyed about visiting a church for the first time.  In surveys, about 60% of people say they first visited a church because someone they knew invited them.  This is one of the clearest findings of all research about church growth.  People come to a church because they know someone who goes there and usually because that person invited them.  And in survey, people said the biggest barriers to visiting a church is that they were afraid they did not know anyone there.  And in survey, when non-church goers were asked why they did not attend church, the number one answer was, “No one has ever invited me.”  Listen.  If you put these three facts together, the overwhelming effective thing we can do to share God’s love is to invite people to worship.  Yet most often we do not.

     A woman told a pastor that she had never been involved in church but that during a very hard time in her life, she began thinking about God and church.  Now at her workplace, she talked to four or five friends about her problems.  Many a lunch had involved crying with these friends about her struggles.  After a while, she decided to visit a nearby church in her neighborhood.  That Sunday morning, as she walked into the sanctuary for the first time, she was shocked to see three of her friends sitting in that church.  She had discussed her problems with these ladies, and yet, not one had suggested that church might help.  Even worse, she had no idea that any of them were even members of a church or that they were Christian believers.  It had just never come up in all their conversations.  

      Sadly, that describes too many church members in America.  Like the lost sheep and the lost coin, people are struggling with the problems of life and they want an answer.  But we sit and never say a word that God could be the answer for them.  Like the lost sheep and the lost coin, they are in need of someone to find them.   What do people want?  They want a friend to invite them.

       Secondly, what do people want that gets them to come back a second time to church?  Let’s listen again to some real people.  38% of people say that “the people” are the main factor.  The warmth, the love, the realness of the congregation gets people back for a second visit.  28% say the pastor was what brought them back.  Knowing someone in the church was only mentioned by 4% of visitors.  So what does this say if we are listening?  While 60% said knowing someone in the church brought them for the first time, only 4% said it was important for bringing them back.  Much more important were the warmth of the people and the preaching/teaching of the pastor.  Most important were the people.  You are the ones who show people the love of God.  People do not remember what the preacher says.  They remember how you made them feel. 

     When there is a lost sheep, Jesus says the shepherd will leave the other 99 sheep to go look for the one lost sheep.  You know, I bet it was the end of the day and that shepherd had gathered in 99 sheep back at his home.  It was time to relax, get comfortable, and have some dinner.  But that shepherd goes back out into the night to find that one lost sheep and bring him home.  Listen.  If we are to seek out those who are lost, we are going to have to leave some comforts behind.  Church will be less about visiting with my friends and more about making visitors feel welcomed.  Church will be less about me and more about them.  Because that is what the lost sheep need.  They need to feel welcomed and feel that this is a place where they can really come home.

      What do people want who visit the first time?  They want an invitation.

  What do people want who return a second time?  They want a welcoming, warm, friendly home.  But what do people want that finally join a new church?  If we listen again, we will discover that at this point the conversation moves in a deeper direction.   By the time people get to a point of making a commitment to Christ and His Church, deeper faith issues are at work.   36% say that something was missing in their lives.  16% said they had been thinking about spiritual things for a long time.  16% said they had experienced a growth in their relationship with God. Almost all answers seemed to revolve around life transformations.   Listen.  When people get ready to fully commit to being part of a church, they are most often seeking transformed lives. 

       This is especially true when people are at transformative times in life.  People are most open to becoming involved with God and His Church during seasons of change in their lives.  It can be a good change like marriage, the birth of a child, or a new job in a new place.  Or it can be a painful change in life such as an illness, a death, a divorce, or the loss of a job.  Whatever the case, disruption in our lives can be a natural point when people are open to change.  They feel a little lost and they need someone who will sweep the room to help them find themselves again.  Can you think of someone whom you know who is going through a change in life?  They may be open to spiritual changes as well.  You can invite them to church.

      Brian was a CPA and a quiet man.  He found it hard to be outgoing and overly friendly with new people.  So he prays that God will bring to his mind people who may be open to Jesus Christ.  Brian says that when he prays, God brings to mind a couple whose son just left for college, or a man who just retired from the accounting firm, or a lady whose husband just died or a couple who just had a baby.  He calls them up and asked them out to lunch or for golf or for coffee.  Then he says that he asks them if they would like to meet him at church this Sunday.  He does not talk about a lot of stuff, but he just invites them.  Brian says that many of them do meet him at church.  He says that a large percentage have joined the church over the years.  Brian says, “I have never been able to tell people about the Lord or lead anyone to Christ or told them about salvation.  I just tell them that God and church mean a lot to me.  And I pray for them.  That’s all.  But they come.”

      You see, there comes a time for every person when they know they need a change of life.  They need transformation.  And that is what the love of God does.  The Bible says in II Corinthians 5:17, “If anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come.”  When you invite people to church, I can change their lives.  And when you begin to invite people to church, it will change your life.  You will be changed as you see people come and stay and grow in Jesus Christ.   Lives are changed.  The whole world is transformed.  This all happens in evangelism.   Amen.